MBAs: Drained Brains

What is the aspiration that drives a top engineering student in India to get into a business school? Is it entrepreneur zeal? Could be. Or is it the understanding of how business systems work. Maybe. Is it the salary and boost in marriage market? Most Probably.

A vast majority of Engineering colleges are used as a path toward MBA. This has huge negative consequences towards our society. Let us consider a mechanical engineering student, joining IIT, and getting through, using the degree to join IIM and later on make strategies to sell shampoos and soaps. Friends do we need a strategy to sell soaps and shampoos? I don’t think so. I am giving my free consulting idea here. If you gotta sell shampoos, oils, talcum powder try to get the average heights of the purchasers region wise. Now the competition between brands will be a matter of keeping them on the shelve that corresponds to the heights of the consumer. No brand ambassadors are needed. With this idea I am just saving Millions of Dollars that companies spend in endorsing celebrities to sell soaps. I could come with this idea because my mind hasn’t been slowed by an expensive MBA degree whose contents can be understood with a Rs.100 membership/month in a public library. Besides MBAs teach to templatize creativity

Now let’s come to the crux. When an Engineer goes for an MBA to sell soaps, the country loses an engineer and a useless manager is created. Let’s take the example of Pepsi and Coke (the drink that does more harm that cocaine). When Amir Khan comes and says the constituent ingredients of Coke are harmless, means that drink is not harmful. I am sure this piece of information is scripted by an MBA with limited thinking capacity. I believe whoever wrote that must go back to standard VI and see that the constituent elements of sugar and petrol are same. Carbon, Hydrogen and Oxygen, to be precise. Since we eat sugar, can we also drink petrol (according to the script)? I have always known that actors in this country are people with limited intelligence, but the same holds for the marketing people here.

Lets turn to MIT, CALTECH, Stanford once. The best of the engineers don’t work for Procter and Gamble but usually joins Los Alamos Lab , DoD, or get to doctoral level research. What they come up with? Almost everything. From Rayban aviators to antidandruff shampoos (which our MBAs sell) to weapons. I don’t say that engineers from these institute don’t join B–schools, the bests don’t. But the vast majority of students who do so for entrepreneual ambitions. The companies formed by MIT – Sloan’s Alumni alone constitute the 24^th largest economy in the world. IIM with its focus for strategizing soap selling cannot reach there.

The more MBAs India produces we are pushed towards the demand side of world terrorism and consumerism (they are almost the same thing). The weapons and toys that they build are often sold in here, coz here the engineers won’t build them, but instead relax in their AC rooms, with bulging belly and making power point presentation on an industry they know nothing about. This also has a link with the system of arranged marriage. An MBA is often a key to increased boost in the marriage market which often competes on the norms of any competitive market.

Keeping all these in mind if USA decides that the tension between India and Pakistan would boost its weapon sales, if the lack pollution will increase sales of antidandruff shampoos, so be it. Coz we are a market a mere market, coin by our engineers who sell soaps.